Patience is a virtue. That I do not have. And God knows that FULL well.
Right now. At this very moment in time, God is teaching me patience. And it sure darn hurts. But honestly and quite surprisingly, I’m okay with it. I am realizing that I cannot do everything right the first time (or even second). This is another one of my weaknesses. I tend to want to do things right on the first try. If I don’t, I tend to get mad and it is very hard for me to see anything in a positive light for a while. Sure, we all learn that this is “bad” when we are kids, but knowing that something is bad is completely different than changing your attitude about it. Sometimes, things do not to come easy or naturally. Sometimes I mess up and I frustrate myself, but really, frustration is not going to get me anywhere. Yes, I do realize how cliche that sounds, but it is a lesson that I am learning right now.
You may be thinking that this shouldn’t be a new lesson for a senior in high school, and don’t worry, it isn’t. It is, however, so obvious to me that GOD is teaching me this lesson. And he is teaching it to me for a reason. I know it is to turn my weakness into a strength, but I’m thinking there’s a little but more to it than that. I think there is something coming down the tracks where I am going to need A LOT of patience. I think God is preparing me for something specific. I guess that is why I’m okay that it hurts right now, because I know God is saving me from pain down the road.
It blows my mind how AWESOME my God is! It is crazy to me that I can genuinely say that right now. God works and is working. It is as simple as that. He is working in me, in my heart, at this moment. And I love and praise Him for it.
I want to conclude this entry with a passage from scripture that I have heard so many times before, yet I have only come to fully understand and appreciate it now.
2 Corinthians 12:8-10
8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Woah. If that doesn’t make you feel a little bit uncomfortable I think you may need to go see a doctor or psychiatrist. This is crazy talk! To DELIGHT and BOAST about your weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecution, and difficulties seems completely wrong, right? I mean, really? “When I am weak, then I am strong” makes absolutely zero sense. Nada. How can you be weak and strong at the same time? Weakness isn’t a good thing. Insults are no fun. Hardships and persecution hurt. And difficulties just waste too much time really. This Paul guy (the author of 2 Corinthians) must be a lunatic! If he was happy when all this “bad” stuff happened, then honestly, he can take everyone’s baggage and savor it for himself!
Question: What is missing from the previous paragraph?
HIS “grace is sufficient.” HIS “power is made perfect in weakness.” I boast gladly about my weaknesses “so that CHRIST’S power may rest on me. It is for CHRIST’S sake that I delight in weakness, insults, hardships, persecution, and difficulties. The key to all this is GOD. This isn’t remotely about me…it’s ALL about HIM.
Thank you my Savior for revealing this to me. Thank you for giving me the words to express how amazed I am by You. Thank you for my weaknesses. Thank you for insults that come my way, for hardships that I face, for persecution in your name, and for difficulties of everyday.